Mom Guilt

 

When I became a mom, without me really realizing it, it became okay to put me last. Part of my self-care is not only taking care of my body through nutrition and exercise, but giving myself permission to do things for me.

Like most Moms, I have no problem going out and getting my son the colored khaki pants he wants (he found 2 pairs and we bought both). I don’t give a second thought about doing things for my family, it’s an integral part of who I am as a mother and a wife and more broadly, as a person.

But when it comes to ME and buying something nice for myself — I start to think twice, even second-guess it. And when I do decide it’s ok for me to get something for myself, it’s typically something that I need, rather than just something I want. Sometimes, those things overlap and that can help alleviate some of the guilt I end up feeling when I think of getting something for myself. But the twinge of Mom Guilt is still there.

This winter I decided I should treat myself to a NICE pair of sunglasses (I’m all about the $10 kind and even have multiple pairs — you know, so I can find them when I need them). So, it was very unlike me when I went on a trip recently and purchased a cool pair of Ray Ban glasses when we were flying home from Orlando.

I’ve wanted UGGS for a long time, but living in AZ I haven’t been able to justify purchasing them. This year I decided – I work hard, I should treat myself to something special!  So, while on the shopping trip with my son for pants (that I mentioned earlier) we got his stuff and then I took him with me to Dillard’s – lucky him. I found a cute pair of UGGs and even bought a hip pair of winter Nike high top shoes.

Funny though, despite the decision to spend a little on me – the guilt still lingers. I’m certain I’ll get over it, but I have to stop from time-to-time and remember that in order to be able to give to others in a sustainable way, I have to stop and recharge myself regularly. You know when they give the safety speech on the airplane they tell you to secure your own oxygen mask first and then help others? The same principle applies to taking care of yourself on a daily basis. And even though it can seem counterintuitive to a Mom, taking care of yourself can enhance, not detract, from what you can do for your family and for the other people in your life.

I may not be able to kick Mom Guilt completely out of my life, but at least I’m going to look stylish on my journey to better self-care in my new sunglasses and boots!

 

xoxo - Lee

 

About Lee

I am a 44-year old married mom of 4. I love my family. If you’re a mom, then you know kids and a spouse keep you busy. It’s easy to forget yourself in the process of taking care of your family. My mission is to help other moms take care of themselves so they can be more available to their loved ones and lead more fulfilling lives.